Thursday, July 31, 2008

Prayer OF my Daughter

The summer usually brings about the breaking of evening routines. Routines that I love, by they way, such as reading with my son and praying with my daughter. One of the common things my daughter says in her prayer (at least she did as of May)is, "please help my brother and me to get along better and not fight so much."

One would think that as a father, it does my heart good to hear this prayer and recognize that my daughter realizes God is her help and hope to become all that He wants her to be. This prayer warmed my heart for about two weeks. Then I recognized "it ain't happening..." the bickering, teasing, and annoying of one another continued at the same level and at times worsened.

This got me thinking about Ashton's prayer, her ever evolving theology, and how she might be interpreting the fact that there is seemingly no answer. The possibilities I considered are:
1. She believes God is not hearing her which could mean she believes God could be unfaithful.
2. She believes this whole idea of getting along with my annoying brother seems to be even out of the reach of God (which I sometimes find myself believing... ahem!).
3. She says to herself, "I say these words at night as a part of my routine prayer and never really think about it again until it is bedtime and time to pray."

Knowing that any one of those possibilities is... err... possible, and knowing that my son, too, had been known to pray this prayer, I decided to take advantage of a teachable moment. The next time they starting having a mild bicker (because a major one means "meltdown" and "I'm not listening!!") I reminded them how they have prayed this prayer and asked them why they think God hasn't done anything. They thought for a couple of seconds and shrugged. I explained that God was not going to magically place a heart of camaraderie in them, but that He is going to build this in them if they allow Him to do so. When you feel yourself wanting to retaliate and annoy, that is the opportunity to allow God to work. It will take time, it will take intentionality, you will not be perfect.

I wish I could tell you that they fell down, tore their clothes, sat in the ashes and grieved over their behavior and/or celebrated with great songs of praise at this new revelation of the goodness and faithfulness of God, but I can't. That's OK, with me. I trust that God will continue his work and I am well aware that there are still SEVERAL opportunities a day for this prayer to be answered. I believe it is happening.

This same kind of thinking is present in adults, too. It is seen in the frustrated couple who prays God will help them love their spouse again, yet continues in the same distant, dysfunctional interaction that does nothing but further estrange them. Or the person who prays for a new job and does nothing but wait for the phone to ring. We miss opportunities for God's work in us all the time. MY prayer is that I begin to recognize them more often in my life. God is faithful.

3 comments:

emily and kyle said...

Good stuff. You can come be our nanny in a couple of years...or 5 years..or 10 years... I like your method of planting the seed and making them think! Good stuff! :) They are lucky to have a dad like you!

Anonymous said...

Paul, I enjoyed reading this. First of all because I can just see and hear them praying this and then continuing. (Allison and I were much the same!) I love the way you planted the seed of thought in their minds...I also appreciate that you posted this - it's a good reminder that we, as Christians, need to be willing to get off our tushies and DO...Thanks! Oh - and tell everyone hi for me! :) Love y'all!!!

Anonymous said...

This reminds me of a question one of my fellow church members asked one evening of our pastor. "Why is there so much evil in the world?"

I put the same question to my Sunday School class the following week. Why? You might as well ask "Why are there so many cars on the road?" There are so many cars on the road because people want them and they are willing to pay for them.

Why do people continue to behave in the same ways? Because they want to. They are willing to pay the price. I'm afraid that, mostly, it's as simple as that. - Bruce