Coincidence

Toward the end of this semester of the Life Span Development class I teach,  we were discussing Erikson's middle adulthood stage of Generativity  vs. Stagnation.  Simply put, it is in this stage that 40-somethings begin to reflect on their life and see what kind of legacy they are leaving behind.  As a part of this discussion we address the existential issue of meaning.  Since HSU is a Christian University, as a part of this chapter I introduce the notion that the idea that "everything happens for a purpose" might be a bit off-base.  What I believe to be true, is slightly, but importantly different.  I believe "from everything a purpose can come."  I don't want to take too much time clarifying and explaining the difference (I already did that in a previous post a while ago).  As I offered my reasoning for the difference, a student raised her hand and asked me if I believed the saying, "there is no such thing as coincidence."  I thought for a moment formulating a response because I know how fervently some people can cling to such cliches as theological "shortcuts."  I decided the best route to follow was the frankly honest route. 

No, I don't believe that there is "no such thing as coincidence."  Simply because of the absolute nature of the statement -- "NO such thing..." I understand and appreciate the sentiment of the cliche which is to illustrate how God can work covertly to bring about "divine appointments" that others might simply explain away as simple coincidence.  It is the notion that every thing is connected and predetermined for a deeper meaning that only we can know in hindsight in this life or ultimately revealed to us in the next.  Again, I take issue with the absolute nature of that sentiment.  As an example, I shared how the other day my boss and I coincidentally wore the same color scheme to work (melon green polo shirt and khaki pants).  We don't have a uniform at work and we didn't call each other and arrange to be "twinkies" it just happened by coincidence. To believe there is "no such thing" would be to assign some type of deeper meaning to the unwitting coordination of colors.  I simply don't believe that to be the case.  Therefore, I do believe in coincidence.

However, I have had experiences that many would chalk-up to coincidence that I believe is true to the spirit of that cliche.  There have been numerous times I have had a random thought about an old friend or a former client who have not been an active part of my life for months or years and this friend calls out of the blue or the client returns to therapy within days of that seeming random thought.  It is almost like retrospective foreshadowing and I immediately believe there is a reason and orchestration to this "coincidence".

God still works in mysterious ways.